And so, 2013 has begun, and we are just over a week into what I am choosing to believe will be the most fabulous year yet. 

As with all new year’s, resolutions are made; and as with all new year’s, resolutions require hard work and extreme dedication in order to stay focused and stay on the path one makes for oneself. 

I found my inspiration for my personal 2013 resolutions whilst sitting on a deck, overlooking a pristine lagoon, with a glass of chilled white wine next to me, listening to the waves crashing in the not so far distance. Somehow, when you are closer to nature, and the ocean in particular, inspiration does not seem too tricky at all.  Throw in a glass of sauvignon blanc, and you are inspired with ease. 

I had to have a good look at myself (luckily not literally given my current post-holiday body shape), and work out what it was that really could do with a bit of tweaking and some vast improvement.  I realized that what I loathe the most in life, is being judged by others – fairly or unfairly, I grow wild with anger when I am judged and criticized.  I feel that “no one has a right to judge” as often you are not walking in the same shoes as the person you are criticizing.  Of course, if the shoes are Chanel ballet pumps, I would most certainly consider walking in their shoes.  But moving on, it became clear to me after my second glass of wine, that the reason I loathe this judgement and criticism just mentioned, is that this has been, up to now, a character flaw of mine. 

I can tell you for free, that this was a “light bulb moment” for me.

So, with the blink of an eye, I had my primary resolution – I will choose to look for only the good in others, and the secondary, complimentary resolution – I will try my very, very best not to judge the behaviour and words of others – and here comes the clanger – “no matter what they do to me or say about me”.  Of course, the last part is the hardest part.  It is so easy when you are being criticized to shoot back some sort of criticism, even if it is not expressed verbally, but rather, you rant and rave in your own mind and think of all the things you would want to say to that person, using language that would better described as “pigeon French”. 

But here’s the thing - it is very rare that the individual who criticizes you is “all bad”.  In fact, what is more likely to be the case is that, for some reason, this particular person has some type of unhappiness in their own life, and you happen to be the nearest target.  It is rare even, that the criticism is personal – very often, it is just a deflection of something bad that is going on in their universe. 

So the lesson, from me, to me, is a simple one: this year, the year that I know will be utterly and completely brilliant, I choose to look for only the positive in others.  I choose to look for the silver linings on the Cumulonimbus clouds; I choose to look for the day rather than the night; I choose to laugh more and cry less; I choose to rather win friends than influence people; I choose to have my cup of Lady Grey tea as one that is half full, rather than half empty; and most of all, I choose to work so hard this year, and do so well this year, that by this time next year, those Chanel ballet pumps I mentioned earlier… will be 110%, entirely mine. 

Happy 2013 everyone.

Life in the very fast lane...: So long, farewell 2012.The year is drawing to a ...

Life in the very fast lane...: So long, farewell 2012.

The year is drawing to a ...: So long, farewell 2012. The year is drawing to a close, and with it comes mixed feelings as to whether this is a good or a bad thing....

So long, farewell 2012.

The year is drawing to a close, and with it comes mixed feelings as to whether this is a good or a bad thing.  For many, 2012 has been a very tough year, and I am afraid I am no exception to this.  I got caught in the fishing net of trouble at various times throughout the year, but, as they say in the classics, you just can’t keep a good woman down.  This implies I am good, but I am afraid I will take the Fifth Amendment on that one.

We all seem to have faced an inordinate number of challenges this year, but we are still here to tell the tale.  The world didn’t end yesterday, which was a huge relief; the Mayan calendar may have drawn to a close, but clearly this is just an opportunity to make a new one.

When I look back on the year, I have few regrets, many memories, and a massive feeling of positivity about what lies ahead.

I have turned forty, I have celebrated, I have sampled the wine, and I have taken the Panado’s.

I am writing this from the sea side, which in itself is a massive treat, and creativity seems to flow in with the tides.  The weather is perfect, the shells on the beach prolific, the sea gulls enthusiastic in their flight, the oysters fresh and chilled.

And so, to the New Year.  May it be a good one for us all.

Rest in peace 2012 – forever remembered, fondly forgotten.

Life in the very fast lane...: This morning I was traveling through the morning t...

Life in the very fast lane...: This morning I was traveling through the morning t...: This morning I was traveling through the morning traffic at a snail’s pace.   Oddly enough, traffic has never messed with my “chi” too muc...

This morning I was traveling through the morning traffic at a snail’s pace.  Oddly enough, traffic has never messed with my “chi” too much as I see it as a time to either listen to the radio, or to listen to some of my favourite tunes at an extremely high volume, which I am sure have partly damaged my ears over the past four decades.

The radio was my choice today, and I was listening to 94.7, to “The Christmas Wish List” – about a single mother with a child who has special needs, and whose Christmas wish was granted through the kindness and generosity of not only the radio station, but the people whom they reach out to who are able to give back.  It immediately struck me as to how lucky I am, as are most of those around me.  I may think I have had a tough year, or that the driver in front of me paid for his license with expired beer, or that my car windows are dirty, or that I am slightly tired, or that I miss the waist line I used to have… the list is endless really.  But the reality is a shorter, sharper list.

I am lucky to not have certain challenges that face others; challenges where you wonder how on earth women such as these gather the strength they need on a daily basis to deal with the trials they need to deal with.  Suddenly, I felt like my life was put into perspective, and reminded myself to be grateful the next time I felt like I was even somewhat hard done by.

I thought too that it was only 7.30 a.m., and already I had found my lesson for the day, so I could now carry on, and think about other things.  How wrong I was.

A little while later, there was a competition on air, which was won by a lovely sounding lady – R2500.00 in grocery store vouchers.  At this time of year, this is a great competition to win (Sauvignon Blanc purchases spike by up to 33% in December – I know this for a fact – but will not be divulging how I know this), and the lovely lady was delighted.  Whilst the DJ was talking to her about her winnings, she asked if half of her prize could be donated to the recipient of the Christmas wish, for toys for the child with special needs.

My skin went mad with goose flesh. 

How incredibly kind and generous of the competition winner to halve her gift in favour of someone more needy than herself.  It showed me immediately, that even when you think you may have been witness to the indescribable trials of another, through the generosity of others, your awareness can be further raised to new heights.

I am the first to acknowledge that 2012 has brought a great deal of suffering to a huge number of people on a global scale – natural disasters, death, war and destruction, not to mention the US election! However, events like this morning somehow manage to put a huge silver lining on any potentially dark cloud, and can, in the space of thirty on air minutes, renew one’s faith in not only the triumph of the human spirit, but also, the kindness and inherent goodness that can and does exist in so many members of the race we call human.

And so the moral:  When one feels that your own road is pot-holed, and trials seem to outweigh tribulations, remember others who are stuck in the middle of one of those life lesson pot-holes; but remember too, above all else, to be kind, and giving to others, whether they are known to us or not.

Life in the very fast lane...: ‘Tis the season to be merry…One of the many things...

Life in the very fast lane...: ‘Tis the season to be merry…One of the many things...: ‘Tis the season to be merry… One of the many things I have always loved about the festive season is the carols that come with it.   I ...

‘Tis the season to be merry…

One of the many things I have always loved about the festive season is the carols that come with it.  I have no doubt many people would want me publicly burnt at the stake for having this adoration, but I am prepared to take my chances.

I have spent my life loving singing, in fact, as a child, an obsession with Olivia Newton-John led to many a home concert, where a teaspoon was my microphone, and my outfit was 100% lycra.  When I got to junior school, all pupils were in the choir, regardless of talent, and not realizing as yet that I was not gifted in this department, I definitely still fancied myself as quite the singer, and felt sure that my future lay in the music world. 

Sadly reality dawned when I got to high school, and was thrown out in round number one of the choir auditions, never to return again.  The most upsetting part about this was not that I had not been allowed to be part of the choir, but now, I had to find another talent I thought I had… needless to say, twenty six years later, I am still searching for that answer!

But I digress.

It is Carols by Candlelight next week and I am already counting the sleeps.  I have started practicing my lines and remembering the lyrics… one would almost think I was part of the performance, when in fact, I am a mere mortal dragging my mother and daughter to something I want to attend.

What I love though about these events is not only the singing, which is obviously a huge part of it; but I love that these functions see families gathering together; I love that the audience and the performers are there because they want to celebrate a special time of year; I love that you see raging joy in children’s faces, and what I suspect I will love most this year, is that there will be a collective sigh of relief that we have all somehow made it through the past twelve months, and we still have much to look forward to.

Of course, the fact that we can take our own picnics, and wine  - well, that is just the angel on the top of the Christmas Carol Tree for me!

And so the moral:  It is the season, it is time to be merry, and it is time to celebrate.  It is time to have fun, it is time to see joy in our children’s eyes, it is time to sing, and quite possibly, it is time for the return of the teaspoon, and the lycra cat suit!