So I sat down and tried to work out what the worst fear
associated with singledom would be – and the answer popped up with ease – this
would be going to a movie on my own. The
worst time to do this? A Friday or a
Saturday evening, when other couples are out and about together, hand in hand,
swapping popcorn boxes and sharing slush puppies. I was proud of the fact that I had worked out
what my “single trigger” would be as they would say in relationship rehab (so I
hear), but now I had to see if I had the courage to do anything about it.
I hopped onto the internet in the safety of my own home
office, where I knew no-one would or could see me. I took a huge plunge… I booked a single movie
ticket online, for a Friday evening. Now
I had to see whether I had the personal strength to get myself there.
Friday rolled along, as they do, and time was ticking slowly
towards movie hour. Surprisingly, I was
slightly excited at the prospect of conquering a personal fear, and so drove
off happily to the movie house, whilst listening intently to my latest self-help
CD in the car. Arriving safely at my
destination, I ordered popcorn for one, and off I went to my seat.
People started rolling in to the movie theatre and I have to
admit, I started to wobble. Were they
all looking at me on my own in the corner thinking “loser”? “Where is her husband, fiancée, boyfriend,
friend, child”? I started studying every
individual popped piece of corn with great interest, praying for the lights to
dim. Luckily for me, the process began
to get easier as I had two predominant thoughts – firstly, I had made it to the
movie on my own, and must be proud of that, and secondly, no one there gave a
damn about who I was and who I was with (or wasn’t with as was the case) –
oddly enough, the second thought was the one that made me feel much better
about the task at hand.
The movie started, the popcorn remained glued to my lap, and
all was well. As luck would have it, the
movie, a typical “chick flick” was exactly what the doctor ordered, and lifted
my spirits immediately. Suddenly, the
garden they call singledom was full of roses, all in bloom. The weekend had begun, and had begun in a
fun, positive, happy way.
The moral is a line I have heard often, but seldom acted
upon, until now: Feel the fear (tick)
and do it anyway (double tick).
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